Archive for July, 2009
Self Esteem Revisited
It seems one of the more popular topics of my blog has been Self Esteem. As such, I wanted to drop out a few tips that may be of help. These are things that you can use everyday, and use in your regular life..
#1. Programming
Program yourself to continually think positive thoughts. Don’t let negative thoughts or words enter your mind or mouth. If you catch yourself saying or thinking something negative, be sure to turn it around and make it something positive.
#2. Use What You Have
Find any resources you can to get a more positive attitude. This can include, but isn’t limited to, blogs (such as this one), workshops, books, and other online resources. Don’t waste the opportunities you have to work on becoming a better person.
#3. Associate With Positive People
Don’t spend time with people that have a negative attitude. Find other people that are positive, and want to improve themselves. They will lift you up as well.
#4.Help Others
Be sure to help other people when you can – this will ultimately lift you up as well as helping them. It is certainly nice to help other people!
I hope these basic tips help. Be sure to think about these things when you are going through your daily life. Keep your chin up, and learn to be a more positive person – you will be thankful that you did!
Break The Habits
Today, I would like to discuss something that I feel is important – yet not really obvious. Have you ever noticed how we sometimes get into routines and patterns? We start doing things in a sort of “rut”. You probably can identify with this – perhaps you always eat at the same restaurant on Friday night, or you always tend to buy groceries at the same place. I refer to this as being “in a rut”. I think the best thing we can do in our lives is to break free from these ruts. Branch out once in a while, and try something new. I used to go to the same restaurants, and order the same things. Then one day, I decided I would try something new. I had never had scallops before, and I didn’t think they be very good. Turns out – I love them! I would never have know that if I had not branched out of my routine.
Being able to stretch and try new things can be a key to succeeding in life, too. Perhaps you have been doing the same career for 10 years, and are thinking you would like to change. Look around online at all the options – even one you don’t think you would particularly enjoy. You may just find there are options out there that are more enjoyable than what you are currently doing. The point here is simple – learning to branch out and try new things in life will allow us all to break free from old habits and routines. This is how we can be more successful and happier in life! If you don’t learn to expand your horizons, you cannot expect to grow and become more successful.
Remember this – if you continue to do as you have been doing, you will continue to get what you have been getting. Isn’t it time to break out of the mold for a change?
Optimism
Optimism is something I want to discuss today. Being an optimist does not mean burying one’s head in the sand. Being an optimist means being in personal control over one’s life, and keeping the negative out of their lives. Many people tend to think that being an optimist means that a person never sees the facts. I tend to think that being an optimist is a healthier, and happier, way of life. What harm can come from trying to see the good in all things, rather than the bad? I think it is worth trying. Just try to see the positive aspects of life. If it is raining, remind yourself that the plants and flowers need that rain more than you need to go on that picnic. If not for the rain, there wouldn’t be any grass or flowers or trees.
Just something to think about….
Are You Lonely?
I have had several people ask me lately about how to deal with loneliness. I thought I would put together a few tips that may be of help to anyone dealing with this.
1. No, It Isn’t Just You
Everyone – even the most popular people – get lonely at some point or another. It doesn’t mean that you are in some way faulty. We are most likely to get lonely when making life transitions and changes, especially when making changes for the better. During these transitions, you will be in a transitional phase and may not have any friends yet. Don’t worry about it – things will change.
2. Get Involved
Find a group, such as a social group. These can be found through sites with local focus, such as meetup.com. Even if you are shy, you can find groups to associate with – such as groups that cover topics like social anxiety. Your Church may also have some groups to get involved with.
3. Start New Relationships
Find some people to spend time with – they don’t have to be your ideal best friend. Just find people you can relate to, and spend some time with them. Ask them to have coffee with you, or call them up to chat. Once you get a bit of social interaction, you will feel much better, and will find it easier to proceed.
4. Take A Chance
Strike up a conversation with someone at a coffee shop, or grocery store, or some other place you happen to be spending time. You never know where you could make a new friend, and even if you don’t, the interaction will make you feel better.
5. Get Out
You will certainly feel lonely if you are sitting around your house alone. Be sure to get out of the house and do things – even if it is just as simple as going to the store, even if you don’t need anything and have no money to spend. Just being out at a big store around others can help you feel a bit more connected with others.
I hope these simple tips will help. I also think this book could help.
Be Positive
One of my favorite quotes comes from Donald Trump. “You have to be positive every single day. You have to put effort into it daily, because no one else is going to do it for you.”. I think this is the best way to describe it – you must put effort into it every single day in order to ensure that you can live a positive life. That doesn’t mean you will never encounter problems. Trump himself has filed for bankruptcy several times, yet he still consistently comes back up to the top. He is still one of the wealthiest people in the World. How does he do it? He doesn’t let things get to him – even something as serious as bankruptcy is only a minor setback, in his eyes. Optimism can be learned, and it can make a huge difference in life. No matter how large and intimidating a challenge might be, facing it with optimism is the thing you can do to manage, shape and eventually triumph over it. Keep that in mind the next time you think the problems you are facing are too big to encounter. Staying positive and staying focused can make all the difference in the World!
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No One Likes Me…
Have you ever heard someone use that phrase? “No one likes me – I don’t have any friends”. I have heard several people say this to me lately, in comments and in person, and I find it rather difficult to believe. Certainly, there may be some people who do not like us – we all experience that. However, if you feel like no one likes you, and you have a hard time finding friends, this can be a challenge to deal with. I think these tips below may help the next time you are in a social situation and need to “work the room”:
1. Find Common Ground
When you meet new people, the first thing you should do is try to find something you both have in common. You may be surprised at how both enjoying the same Italian restaurant can start a long conversation, which ultimately leads to long term friends. Bring up subjects with which you are familiar – it could be anything, including your career, your family, where you went to school, your favorite movie or music genre, your favorite sports team, and more. Once you have that common ground, you will both be a bit more comfortable, which will lead to further conversations about other topics.
2. Be Yourself
The old adage really is true – if you seem pretentious, awkward, or otherwise fake, no one will want to be around you. Just relax, and pretend as if you will never see or hear from the people again. If there is no pressure, you are more likely to be yourself and come across as cool, calm, and relaxed. Think about it – would you rather make conversation with someone who is uptight or someone who is casual?
3.Don’t Brag
Introducing yourself as a self made millionaire who travels the world and owns your own jet will not come across as cool – it will seem like bragging. I am always more impressed to meet someone and later learn from another source they are filthy rich rather than meet someone and have them tell me so immediately.
4. Don’t Be Shy
If you are in a social setting, just walk up to people and introduce yourself. I have even found that, if you are shy, you can greet someone by telling them that you are shy and are trying to get over that by introducing yourself to new people. This will ensure a much smoother introduction, and you may even make a friend.
I hope this helps, friends. Let me know in the comments what you think!
B
Keep Going Forward
Just a quick line today, folks. Remember, if you want to be successful in life – you must always be moving forward. Living in the past will never get you where you want to be. If something in your past is bothering you, learn to let it go and press onward and upward. If you don’t, you will be stuck in the past forever.
B
Success
Friends, success may not come easily, and it doesn’t come without a lot of work. I just want you all to remember that you CAN do it! We have all been through tough times, long battles, and challenges that seem insurmountable. If you don’t believe in you, why would anyone else? Be sure to assure yourself everyday that you can and will make it.
Remember – what the mind can conceive, the mind can achieve.
Learn From Failure
I had to take a brief hiatus from writing, but wanted to resume writing again.
Today’s topic is something you will want to remember.
LEARN FROM FAILURE
We have all failed at something in our lives. Remember, failure is not in and of itself a bad thing. Failing at something gives us a chance to learn valuable lessons, and also lets us know if we are on the wrong track. We may simply be pursuing something in the wrong way, or taking the wrong approach to the problem. We could even be pursuing something that is not the best for us personally. The next time you experience failure, take the time to analyze the situation and figure out which of these is most relevant to your experience. You will be glad you did.
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