Friend, a frequent reader suggested this topic. I am always open to suggestions – feel free to leave me a comment, and I will see if I can work your topic into the mix. Today’s topic is: Overcoming Regret

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So, what is regret? Regret is a strong feeling of disappointment or pain regarding a previous situation. If you have regrets in your life for things you have done, or said, or didn’t do, it can make life tough.

Regret is powerful, as it can cause you to relive a moment in time, over and over again, wishing you could reverse time and change what happened. The problem is, this can start a vicious cycle. You will start to recall that event over and over again, thus prohibiting you from taking future actions that remind you in any way of the previous event. This can sap your happiness, steal your joy, and cause you to live in this cycle of pain.

Breaking this cycle is possible, and following are 4 steps that can help.

#1. Count To Ten

I know, this sounds obvious. Remember, the decisions you make now will affect you in the future, so before you say or do something you may regret later, count to ten before you do something in anger. This can help you to ensure you don’t do things that you regret later.

#2. Change Your Thinking

Often, when we have regrets, we keep replaying the moment in time in our head, over and over again. However, we need to stop ourselves when that happens. Letting this replay only strengthens the negative images. Don’t allow these past situations to be the rerun of your mind daily, or you will be condemning yourself to live in the past forever. You cannot change it, so why relive it daily?

#3. Create a Plan For The Future

You have to ask yourself the tough questions, to ensure you are correct in your perception. It is possible that you saw things much differently, and more harshly, than others did. You need to be sure you ask yourself how you made a mistake, and how you will change it in the future, and once this is answered, don’t relive it again. If you are correct in your perceptions, make sure you know exactly what you did wrong, so you can fix it next time. Start envisioning how you will handle yourself next time, and remind yourself of what you can do better. This will help you positively remind yourself of how you should behave, rather than how you did.

#4. Forgive Yourself

You must be willing to forgive yourself of these previous regrettable situations, and allow yourself to move forward. Don’t keep condemning yourself. Remember, we are all human, so remind yourself that we all do stupid things now and again. Perhaps you are one who is more than willing to ”forgive and forget” when someone else makes a mistake, but you don’t give yourself that same leeway. Start letting yourself off the hook – as long as you vow to do better in the future. Living in the past will prohibit future opportunity, so let it go. Seriously, it is ok to let it go.

I hope this helps a bit in dealing with regret – which can be a really challenging subject in life. Also, I found this book, which will be of great help in that area.

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